Today’s HumanFuckery: Girl, 16, Kills Herself After Instagram Poll To Decide Between Life Or Death!!! (5/16/2019)

Teen Kills Herself After Instagram Poll To Decide Between Life Or Death!

Excerpt From Article:

Authorities in Malaysia have launched an investigation after a teenage girl was found to have taken her own life after starting an Instagram poll asking users to vote for life or death.

The unnamed 16-year-old posed the question to users on Monday, saying: “Really important, help me choose: D/L.”

Hours later, the teenager jumped to her death from the roof of a building in the east Malaysia state of Sarawak.

District police chief Aidil Bolhassan said 69% of respondents at the time of her death had selected “D”. However, Instagram maintains that the poll ended after 24 hours with 88% of her followers choosing “L”.
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First and foremost we at humanfuckery.com send our condolences to ones who love this child! It’s really crazy how much some folks value the opinions of random folks you’ll probably never even meet in real life! What a time to be alive folks!! So sad!!

source:uk.news.yahoo.com

Today’s HumanFuckery: Florida Woman Beats Husband After He Attempts Threesome!! (5/15/2019)

Wife Beats Husband With Broom Stick Over Threesome!!
Excerpt From Article:

A Gainesville woman was arrested on Monday after she was accused of beating her husband when he attempted to have a threesome.

According to the Alachua County Sheriff’s arrest report, Kytonda King, 28, became angry when her husband attempted to have a threesome with her and another woman.

When King’s husband went to the living room to lay down, she hit him in the head with a broom stick. Her husband attempted to defend himself and when he sat back down, King knocked him unconscious with an unknown object.

Deputies say that when King’s husband was being interviewed at Shands Trauma Care, he was going in and out of consciousness.

King was arrested and charged with aggravated battery. She is in the Alachua County Jail with no bond set.
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Nothing much more to say about this fuckery, this fuckery speak for itself!! For more threesome fuckery, please feel free to visit the links below!!

see also:Girlfriend Sent Home In Taxi After Threesome Admits To Police She Set Boyfriend’s House On Fire!!!

see also:Naked Woman Tries To Bite Off Man’s Dick During Threesome!!!

see also:Woman Stabs Man With Scissors Over A Threesome!

source:wcjb.com

Today’s HumanFuckery: Audience Member Calls 911 After Attending Ahmed Ahmed’s Comedy Show!!! (5/15/2019)

Audience Member Calls 911 On Comic!!

Jeez.. It’s crazy how sensitive some folks have become today! This man went to a fucking comedy club, what type of jokes did you expect to hear… really?? To view more asinine 911 calls feel free to visit the see also links below!

see also:Florida Woman Arrested For Calling 911 On Boyfriend For ‘Not Being Nice’!!

see also: Burger King Customer Calls 911 Because BK Wouldn’t Honor Free Whopper Coupon!!!

see also:Canadian Woman Calls 911 Because Pizza Was Not Ready On Time!!!

see also:Florida Woman’s Calls 911 Because She Needed Beer!!

see also: Connecticut Man Calls 911 About Clam Chowder 4 Times!!!

see also: Iowa Woman Calls 911 For Clogged Toilet And Broken TV!!!

source:nbc-2.com

Today’s HumanFuckery: “Playing Naked Enhances His Skill Level” Florida Man Arrested For Playing Basketball Naked!! (5/14/2019)

Florida Man Arrested For Playing Basketball Naked!!

Due To Length Of Article We’ve Decided To Repost:

A Florida man is facing an indecent exposure charge after police found him playing basketball naked at a park in Seminole County.

Longwood police were called to Candy Land Park on Sunday night for a man who was not wearing clothes walking around the park.

Responding officers say they found Jordan Anderson naked and playing basketball on the park’s court. When asked what he was doing, police say Anderson told them he was working on his basketball skills.

Police say the man put his clothes back on when asked.

Anderson was arrested for indecent exposure of sexual organs and taken to the John E Polk Correctional Facility.
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To be honest this fool probably has zero skills with either clothes on or off!! There’s nothing much more to say about this fuckery, this fuckery speaks for itself!!!

see also:Virginia Man Calls Cops After Being Fouled In Basketball Game!!!

see also:Dallas High School Basketball Star Was Actually 25 Year Old Man!!!

sources:wfla.com thesmokinggun.com

Fuckery We Missed: South Dakota Man Accused Of Stealing ”A Bunch” Of Sex Toys From House!!! (5/13/209)

Man Steals “A Bunch” Of Sex Toy From House!!!

Excerpt From Article:

Brody Fuchs, 25, took “a bunch” of sex toys from a Tyndall residence over “a couple” years, said Bon Homme County Sheriff’s Deputy Brian McGuire.

McGuire responded to a report from a man who said he had some items missing from his house in Tyndall, according to an affidavit.

The man and his wife had installed a camera system inside the house, which caught Fuchs entering their home for about 40 seconds and then leaving, according to the affidavit. The man said he hadn’t granted Fuchs entry to the house. McGuire did not say if the two knew each other.

The man also said that other items had been stolen in the past. He said he would replace the items and they’d be stolen again.

A deputy conducted a search warrant of Fuchs’ residence and found a number of sex toys that the victim said belonged to him. The value of the toys were reported by the victim, McGuire said.
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Unbelievable!! What type of freak breaks into someone’s home and steals sex toys??? One can only assume that this fucktard used these toys too after he stole them!!!! Unbelievable!!

see also:Man Breaks In Woman’s Home, Pisses On Her Bed And Steals Her Sex Toys!!! After Only One Date!

see also:Sex Toys, 30,000 Condoms Stolen From Las Vegas Warehouse!! (6/1/2017)

see also:Harvard Administrators Accused Of Stealing Money Meant For Students With Disabilities! Administrators Used Money On Apple Products And Sex Toys!!

source:argusleader.com

Today’s HumanFuckery: Florida Man Exposes Genitals During Church Service!!! (5/13/2019)

“The Lord Made Told Me To Do It”

Due To Length Of Article We’ve Decided To Repsot:

A 48-year-old man exposed his penis to a crowd of 39 during a church service at the Vero Beach, FL, Central Assembly of God.

Witnesses told police that Christopher James Frey walked up during the service and turned to face the crowd. He pulled down his pants and “exposed his penis to everyone in the room during the service,” according to the police report.

Men in the church ran up and made him pull his pants back up and walked him out of the room while somebody from the church called the Indian River County Sheriff’s Office.
Deputies asked Frey why he would do such a thing.

“The Lord told me to do it,” he said.

He was charged with exposure of sexual organs and disorderly conduct.
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This church was probably was packed with yesterday being Mother’s Day… This dummy must have been under the influence of something to do something this stupid!!

source:wtxl.com

Potential Father Of The Year: Dad Claimed His Daughter Was Abducted In Carjacking, Dad Lied About Abduction To Get Car Back Faster!! (5/13/2019)

Dad Lied About Abduction To Get Car Back Faster!!

Either this fucktard isn’t fully sure how car insurance works or that he doesn’t have it to pull some fuckery like this.. Sadly we’ve seen someone falsify a amber alert because they were ripped off during a drug deal, for more info on that story please feel free to visit the see also link below. View the other potential father of the year candidates also in the see also section below!

see also:Amber Alert For Missing Illinois Infant Was A Hoax!!!

see also:Potential Father Of The Year: Man Charged With Murder For Punching Newborn Son After Losing Video Game!!

see also:Potential Father Of The Year Candidate : Father Hits Daughter’s Face With Hammer Because She Couldn’t Find A Job After Graduation!!!

see also:Potential Candidate For Father Of The Year: Son Didn’t Want A Bath, Dad Attempts To Run Him Over With Truck!!!!

see also:Potential Candidate For Father Of The Year: Man Left His 2 Autistic Children Outside For More Than 10 hours On Cold Day!!

source:ktvu.com

Fuckery We Missed: Man Says Sasquatch Attacked Him With An Ax!!! (5/13/2019)

Man Says Sasquatch Attacked Him With An Ax!!

Due To Length Of The Article We’ve Decided To Repost:

A follow-up to a story of a Klamath County man accused of telling police that he was being assaulted by Sasquatch.

A call came into Klamath County 911 dispatch late Wednesday afternoon from a caller claiming that a man was trying to kill him with an ax.

“The caller was not providing a lot of information,” said Klamath County Deputy District Attorney Cole Chase. “And was threatening, rude, and abusive to 911 dispatchers, but the officers still responded quickly.”

Officers responded at high speed to the Chiloquin area.

Deputies say Timothy Drennen told them that Sasquatch was the one who attacked him.

“The defendant Mr. Drennen was combative, made some threats, but ultimately was taken into custody without any physical incident,” Chase said.

The deputy D.A. says he can’t comment on any evidence that may be presented in court, though he added an important observation: “Upon a subsequent investigation, there were no signs that Sasquatch was present.”

Drennen is charged with misuse of 911 and initiating a false report.

“It doesn’t appear as though there’s any issue of mental health concern here,” Chase said. “This was strictly intoxication.”
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Man what exactly was this man under the influence of if he was trippin and saw sasquatch?? Our guess is meth!!

see also:Montana Man Says He Was Shot After Being Mistaken For Bigfoot!!!

source:kobi5.com

Happy Mother’s Day From Us At HumanFuckery.com!!! (5/12/2019)

In observance of Mother’s Day we’ve elected to repost all the Mothers who are in contention for our end of the year award for Mother Of The Year!

Fun fact: Americans are estimated to spend a bout $25 BILLION on Mother’s Day gifts this year!! How much do you think these Mother’s below are gonna have spent on them???

Potential Mother Of The Year: Mother Drove Drunk To “Teach Her Son A Lesson”!!!

Due To Length Of Article We’ve Decided To Repost:

LEXINGTON, Ky. (WKYT) – A mother has been charged with DUI and endangering the welfare of a minor after reportedly driving drunk with her son in the vehicle.

According to her arrest citation, 48-year-old Sunita Jairam told police she “drank a lot of beer and got in her car to drive to teach her son a lesson.” She also claimed to have driven at 150 mph while the child was in the car.

Officers say Jairam smelled of alcohol and was slurring her speech. Jairam also reportedly told investigators that she had been drinking all day.

The citation says Jairam’s son told police he had tried to get out of the car several times because of his mother’s driving, but was unable to because the door was locked.

Jairam was taken to the Fayette County Detention Center.
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First and foremost glad no one was hurt!! This woman’s son should take note on how much everything is going to cost this woman… Between bailing out of jail, getting your car out impound, hiring a good lawyer, and potential fines for your crime you’re probably looking at about $10,000! Also this son should take note on how time consuming getting a DUI is between going to court for lord knows how long, to going to court appointed classes, oh and if you’re placed on probation you have to meet with your probation officer regularly too,and you possibly may have to do community service also! Thanks Mom for the life lesson!

see also:“You Are Dreaming”: Florida Woman Arrested For DUI Tried To Convince Injured Victim He Was Dreaming!!

see also:2 Woman Arrested For DUI Twice In One Day!!

see also:“I Drink To Get Drunk” Minnesota Man Arrested For 28th DUI!!

source:wkyt.com

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Two Potential Mother Of The Year Candidates : Polar Vortex Edition!!

Iowa Mom Charged After Leaving Kids Alone In Car In Single Digit Temperatures!!!

source:ketv.com

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Kansas Mom Charged After Going Into Bar, Leaving 2 Toddlers In Car On Freezing Night

source:fox4kc.com
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Potential Mother Of The Year: South Carolina Woman Posts A Facebook Video Of Her Pouring Water On Sleeping 9-Month-Old’s Face!!

Excerpt From Article:

Deputies say that on Jan. 26 at a location on Camden Highway, Hardy caused “ill-treatment, unnecessary pain and suffering, and/or deprivation of necessary sustenance upon a female minor child” after she poured water on her child’s face and posted a video of it on Facebook.

After being poured with water the second time, the infant woke up coughing. A number of concerned people contacted the Sumter County Sheriff’s Office regarding these images and video.

Screenshots of the post circulating on social media show the original post saying: “Payback for waking me up all kinda times of da night.”
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This “mom” deserves every charge shes facing, Hopefully she’ll get some jail time for this fuckery!!! Unbelievable!!

source:wistv.com

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Potential Mother Of The Year Candidate : New Jersey Mom Killed Toddler Because He Wouldn’t Eat, Listen!

Unbelievable.. Any parent should know that any kid that’s 23 months old will be defiant at times and not do as told at times, that doesn’t mean that you kill them!! We at humanfuckery.com send our condolences to the ones who love this poor child!

source:nbcnewyork.com

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Potential Mother Of The Year: Mother Accused Of Faking 5 Year Old’s Illness For Disability Checks!! (

Here’s a wild idea… Instead of faking your son’s illness for money how about you get yourself a job? Eh it doesn’t matter now since you’re headed to jail, hopefully for a lengthy stay!

source:wsbtv.com
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Potential Mother Of The Year Candidate: Texas Mom Facing Up To 20 Years In Jail For Leaving Her Five Kids Home Alone During Myrtle Beach Trip!!

Excerpt From Article:

Chrystal Nichole Walraven was arrested in February and charged with two counts of abandoning or endangering a child, which is a second-degree felony. Her children range in age from 15 months to 12 years old.

The 28-year-old mother told authorities she traveled to Myrtle Beach back in August “because she needed to get away from everything that was happening at home” and to investigate a job opportunity, according a newly-released affidavit obtained by the Austin Statesman.

She stayed with a male friend during her days away and went to the beach as well as other tourist attractions while her children struggled to get by back at home.
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WTF!!! Honestly we doubt this woman will be charged with 20 years, we say that due to the fact that we’ve come across a mom from Iowa who left her kids home alone while she vacationed in….. GERMANY!! In that particular case this woman only received… 2 YEARS PROBATION!! For more info on similar incidents of fuckery and please feel free to visit the see also links below.

see also: Mom Accused Of Leaving Kids Home Alone In The US While Vacationing In Germany!!

see also:Mom Leaves Her 3 Kids At Home While She Vacationed In Cancun!!

source:nydailynews.com
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Potential Mother Of The Year Candidate: Mother Runs Over Drunk Son On Purpose!!

This mom gave ZERO FUCKS that day… We at humanfuckery.com wish this man a speedy recovery, that’s if he makes one!

source:kimt.com

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Potential Mother Of The Year: Police: Phoenix Child Punched For Not Being Good Enough Lookout For Shoplifting Grandma!!

Excerpt From Article:

Court documents state 27-year-old Rebecca Gonzales came to the store to pick up her 7-year-old son, who was being used by his grandmother as a lookout while she shoplifted.

Officers reportedly saw Gonzales slap and punch the child in the face when she was in the parking lot.

The child reportedly told police that he was hit because “he didn’t watch out for his grandma good enough.”
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At a loss for words with this fuckery!!

source:abc15.com